Last weekend, my heart broke as I listened to you crying over the phone. The past weeks had been so rough for you - as you took care of older bro.'s family - his wife and his daughter - thinking how sis-in-law's health would improve and how to pay the hospital bill. When you cry, I cry - and it is just so painful for me as much as it is for you. I'm glad though that things are a bit better now. It is because of you (and the rest of the family) that I work harder - I want to give you a better life. I will try my very best not to give you other reasons to cry that way, if you do, I want your tears to be born out of joy. Hang in there, Mama. I'm just here to help.
You've been filled with fears, doubts and worries the past days. It's been one tough week as well, a roller-coaster-ride of emotions - highs and lows. But Girl, remember that it is fine to be afraid, or to doubt, or to worry. But do not let them control you. Success is not attained by the fearful but by the courageous one - someone who has a brave heart. Stay strong amidst the storm. Dance in the rain, as they say.
Dear Cheska (my baby niece),
Thank you for being such a source of joy. Thank you for bugging Mama to call me so you can say "Hello" over the phone and sing "Twinkle Twinkle". You are a sweet, bright kid. I hope you continue to grow as such. I love you my baby cake.
Dear Old Childhood Photos,
Looking at you brought a rush of sweet childhood memories. It is nice that you have captured our (my sibs and mine) younger years. I especially love that photo showing Erick, my older brother, Aivon and I playing in the park. We were playing tag, and my older bro was out to catch me, but I stayed on the platform because it was a "safe" place for me. :D Erick was very much enjoying himself, and everything was captured so well (sorry for the small photo though, dear friends). I can't believe that time has flown so fast. We are all grown-ups now and have different lives to lead. But I am so happy that we had such great time together as little kids. It is great to have stuff like this to go back to when times are hard. Thank you for the memories.
I can't express how thankful I am that you are around. Thank you for encouraging me at all times, even thinking of so many ways to make things easier for me. I love it that you foresee things in an amusing way. Thank you for making me smile even when I am too stressed-out or plain upset. I wish I'd have the chance to make you feel that you are as much loved and thought of. Stay sweet. Don't give up on me.
I guess at this moment, you want me to ponder on this:
"If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other"
(by God (You), Evan Almighty)
(by God (You), Evan Almighty)
You want me to learn about some essential things in life. I believe that's what the challenges are for. I sometimes think what are these trials for? And then it dawned on me - I prayed for them. It's just that You are not the kind who spoon feeds Your children. So, Dear Father, I will try my very best to see the blessing behind the burden. Thank You for loving me this way. Loving me while giving me strength.
~ Nica ~